Why every product manager needs mentors and how to find them

How to nurture relationships that transpire into an evolving panel of career advisors

Mentors play a critical role in product management. I have personally benefited immensely from my informal and formal mentors. In this post, I'll elaborate on why you need a mentor, how to find a good set of mentors, and how to engage with them effectively.

Why You Need a Mentor

Let's start with why we need mentors. Just like in racing, where every driver needs a crew chief with a bird's-eye view to guide them about blind spots, upcoming hurdles, and opportunities to get ahead, in product management, you need someone who is aware but detached enough from your day-to-day to offer neutral, high-level advice. This allows you to think bigger, broader, and find insights that aren't obvious from your perspective. Having a mentor gives you access to wisdom you can tap into when you're stuck or trying to achieve something beyond your current capabilities. A weekly or monthly touch-base with your mentor offers a powerful placeholder where you can park ideas, questions, or insights you're seeking throughout the week, freeing you to focus on what you can accomplish yourself. Mentors can also be a bridge to people, ideas, and solutions you may not have direct access to.

Finding the Right Mentors

Finding the right mentors begins with a mindset shift. Rather than seeking a dedicated lifetime mentor, think of mentors as an evolving panel of advisers for your career, accessible based on your current phase and situation. Start by organically building a network of individuals you admire, relate to, and who are interested in your growth. Approach this with curiosity and humility.

For instance, if you enjoy a product presentation, reach out to the presenter. Express your appreciation for specific aspects of their talk and ask if they'd be open to a "curiosity connect" where you can learn more about their product area. Similarly, if you notice a respected individual engaged in a meeting, you're leading, follow up to ask for feedback and inquire if they'd be interested in providing more comprehensive input.

As you build relationships, assess whether individuals could be part of your mentor network. A good mentor is an excellent listener, genuinely interested in helping others, and excels in one or more leadership principles. Don't rush to formalize these relationships—you can consider them mentors and leverage their guidance as long as you stay in touch and keep them informed about your focus areas.

Once you've established rapport, you might choose a formal mentor to meet monthly for long-term goal setting. Ensure this mentor is senior enough in the organization (at least a level or two above you) to offer meaningful high-level guidance. It's crucial that this mentor cares about you, knows you, and has time to meet with you. If your formal mentor meets the first two criteria but lacks time, it's challenging to maximize the relationship's potential.

Finding the right mentors is an ongoing process. Early in your career, a mentor should help you navigate organizational structures and develop specific skills like communication or relationship-building. As you progress, mentors can help identify broader opportunities or prioritize options for maximum impact. When joining a new team or starting a new product, a mentor can help you acclimate to the team or domain. If you're transitioning roles or exploring new opportunities, a mentor can help define selection criteria. For example, one of my mentors helped me choose my next opportunity and, after I transitioned, challenged me to refine my role to ensure it offered scope for career growth.

Engaging Effectively with Your Mentors

The next crucial step is effectively engaging with your mentors. As discussed, you'll have both informal and formal mentors. For informal mentors, aim to stay connected by updating them on your work and challenges, and seeking help when needed. With formal mentors, establish a regular meeting schedule and set a goal for the next 6 to 18 months. For instance, if you're aspiring to a management role, use your time with your formal mentor to explore how and when to propose this to your manager, and how to develop the necessary skills for when the opportunity arises.

Treat the mentoring session as sacred—set aside time to prepare a few hours or a day in advance. Much can change between sessions, so send your mentor a recap beforehand and highlight areas you'd like to focus on. This enables your mentor to provide more targeted guidance during your face-to-face time. Cultivate genuine gratitude for their time and let it shine through in your interactions.

Make it mutual

Unlike coaching, which often involves paid engagements or formal agreements, mentoring is an act of kindness. Your mentor doesn't expect much in return. However, when possible, strive to make the relationship mutual—ask if there's a way you can reciprocate. This might involve mentoring someone from your mentor's organization or offering an outside perspective on their product, strategy, or team culture. You could also evangelize their product or help connect the dots when there's a synergy. Sometimes, simply expressing your intent to help is enough, and an opportunity will present itself when the timing is right.

Conclusion

In summary, having a rich panel of mentors is critical for product management success. Remember that this forum is a living, breathing network, so nurture it organically and leverage it based on your career phase and product situation. Make effective use of your time with mentors by being proactive about setting up recurring meetings, keeping them updated on your focus areas, and making it easy for them to mentor you. Lastly, seek opportunities to return the favor.